Wednesday, July 06, 2005

Ginko Biloba...

That's what it's coming to.

The fact I saw ghosts, yes that was ghost(s) plural, in my house the other night and forgot to blog about it, just means that the old gray matter is not what it used to be.

Check it.

It was a late Thursday evening, Monday in the real world and Jackass had been up surfing. reading, listening to tunes and chatting with sweet internet babes via the telephone or whatever that device is called. Jackass is notorious for staying up way past his bed time. While talking he remembered how he hates being awake when the fucking birds start chirping. He also remembered that he really had shit to say about anything. I bid my friend on the phone adieux, or maybe it was me snoring on the phone that prompted her to tell me to wake and go to sleep. The jury is still out on this one.

So we said our good-byes and talk to you tomorrows and I smiled with that Fuck yeah, it's bed time smile and hung up the phone. In the fifteen seconds after I hung the phone up, I watched two white orbs float deliberately through the room. Not stopping anywhere, but making their presence known. Normally, that would have scared the shit and $4 out of me but since I was so tired and the ghosts seemed to have no form other than that of a sphere, how could I scream like my virginity was being taken and still respect myself?

The next few minutes were filled with hypotheses of what besides ghosts could these things be. It being Independence Day, I thought maybe reflections from some weird ass fireworks, but my room is such that reflections are not possible and even though the river out back is polluted as Nick Nolte on Cinco de Mayo, there is no chance of swamp gasses. So like Forrest Gump, I ran and I ran around in my mind at least and tried to come up with something.

For lack of a better explanation, and due to the fact there was no real feeling of being scared or any sort of malevolence when I saw these ghosts, I have to think it is my grandparents. I live in a side-by-side duplex and we have been renovating what used to be my grandparents side, after the tenants of doom moved out. Part of me wants to think its just G'ma and Pop checking up on the quality of the work, another part of me thinks too many things that could be seen after 10pm on tv or the sci-fi channel.

So like a chump, with a severe case of baby-dick, I slept with the lights on last night. I just couldn't deal with the thought of a repeat performance. If you are giggling at my emasculation, dial 1-800-Blow-me, until it's happened to you, you can't wear your tough-guy/gal shirt.

T. Pierce over at the world infamous, busblog reminds us all that it's Bushie's birthday today. Stop by and check him out, and leave some birthday wishes for Bushie.


Boogie Pants Donavan said...

I totally believe you. My house is haunted. I also am mental unstable though so you have to take that with a grain of salt.

Boogie Pants Donavan said...


n.v. said...

JJ, I love this post. "Fuck yeah it's time for bed smile." You're so Quagmire in this post.