Monday, August 25, 2008

New School / Olde School

Ahhh!!! Procrastination will be the fucking death of me!

So much to do this week, I might freak out. It's going to be interesting. Most of what is on the “to do list” is top secret, lucky for you, blogging(?) is not on the, “to do list.”

Last night I did go and witness the rebirth of the rock. Old friends' new band played at The Living Room and I'm happy to report that it's still the filthiest fucking club in the known universe. Those of you whom I went to college with, who witnessed the filth that was the floor of Jake's/Bangers/whateveritwascalledafter2000, this place makes that look like a hospital. Anywho, new band went on at 8:30, which was great for my old man ass. I can't be raging and rocking into the wee hours of the morning any more, not and hope to be any sort of productive at least.

Show was good, music is not quite my cup of tea, a little dirty 70's rock. Stuff I wasn't into a bazillion years ago, but I have to say that it was one of the most solid performances and best sounding sets I've ever heard in that dump. The headliner...Overcast, was a band I used to really, really dig in the early ninety's. The played the type of hardcore that was just brutal and Overcast came to be a staple of the New England Hardcore Scene. How they were repeatedly passed over by indie metal labels, I have no idea. I would have love to have stayed and been aurally abused by Overcast, but recent illnesses, my hunger and a few other things told me to go home. As I sit here and write this post, I'm listening to Reborn to Kill Again, a re-recording of all old Overcast songs, by Overcast. I have to tell you, I'm kicking myself in the ass for not finishing the gig last night.

However, there are just some places you don't even want to be confronted with having to take a shit.

23 Rathbone Street
Providence, RI 02903
happens to be one of those places.

I hope you all are well.


Saturday, August 23, 2008


I'm a man of reasonable patience but shit is getting crazy yo...

I waited in line for gas for 45 minutes...eff that!

today I went to the Stop&Shop you know, cause it's the grocery store near my house, that also sells gasoline, and they have this cool rewards program, hooked up to the little card you scan every time you shop. Something to the effect of, spend x amount of dollars get y cents off of a gallon of gas. Not only does this give me incentive to shop earn more $$$ off of gas, but it gives me an incentive to buy better, more expensive food, thus eating better.

...not that I live on koolade and moon pies mind you, but I have been known to still rock the ramen noodles, even as a grown adult. Eating ramen kind of makes me mad, cause I made a promise to myself that I would never eat it again, after college. However, the summer that I worked on the landscaping crew at school, and essentially lived on ramen, was one of the best summers ever. Not cause of the ramen mind you, but the camaraderie of a bunch of misfits doing back breaking manual labor, for pennies an hour, and we still felt like we had the best jobs in the world. Yeah, there was a fuck-load of shit to get done everyday and the heat and humidity were often lunacy but it was still just sheer awesomeness.

Wake up usually around 5:50 am to roll into the clothes you wore yesterday to get to the maintanence dept for 6:00
punch in
wait for bosses to show up at 7:00
some would sleep more
some would chat it up
I would eat my “breakfast ramen” dry, no seasoning, like raw spaghetti...

Boss man and sidekick would show at 7:00
both bleary-eyed from a long night of drinking
much like the rest of us
give us shit for not working yet
when all the equipment was under their locks and keys

decent size team
two trimmers
two mowers
two ride ons
and the flower bed girls

7:30 and the humidty already ridiculous
ramen gone
four cups of water down
half a mile of grass cut already
seven hours of work left

on to next job
Yon's field, Yon's the Bro's house
passed the first bowl to pass the time
mow and trim and mow and trim and mow and trim
water break
holy shit it's 10:15
coffee break consisting of one lunchable and either mountain dew or chocolate milk, depending on humidity
rush back to work, corn nuts rattling in a pocket
off to the president's house
but first, a stop at the pole barn
...another bowl
so effin' hot
five cups of ice water
corn nuts for the salt
guy from malaysia in a long sleeve rugby shirt and corduroys...laughing at all of us

If we had money, 5 minutes down the road for two ham'n'cheese samiches and the biggest mt dew ever
no cash, back to the dorm, ramen with water dumped out, no seasoning, either hot sauce/ketchup/hot mustard and a gallon of water
back to garage for 12:30, quick snooze under the trees
1PM let's hit 'er
no more grass to smoke but plenty to cut
ripping on one another during water breaks
raunchy jokes
butt-nut fights
wondering if it's possible to sweat anymore
no more corn nuts

finish with current job and hide out for half hour in a/c cooled building
someone always on watch for the boss
running out the back door, equipment primed and ready to go
back to sweat pouring and smelling like hard work and filthy ass
hour later back at the garage, packing it in, boss with dilly bars for all
stretch out the cramps and cool down
walk over to punch out
climb mt. olympus to go home shower and do it all again
in 12 hours

Sunday, August 17, 2008

So bitter right now...

There's been a whole lot of thinking going on and not a whole lot of writing. I'm not wasting time with an apology cause for one, I'm not really sorry and two, what's the point? If people were really interested with what is going on, the emails, calls and such would have been coming in. Here again this is not me looking for sympathy, empathy or anything ending in athy, it's just one guy speaking his mind on his feelings.

Back to the aforementioned thinking...

damn, you know you have a lot on your mind when if you don't keep yourself busy, you start to think in monologues, soliloquies or asides. Usually when this happens, I take it as a sign to start blogging but what if I really don't have anything to say? Then my incessant rambling becomes nothing more than, “today I got up and had some breakfast...” So what? Most people do both of those things, wake up and or at some point during the day, eat something. Just because it may not be morning, does not mean you can't call your first meal of the day breakfast.

This is all going to seem disjointed and purposeless but I have to get it all out or I think I might scream. I fucking hate being responsible and having a great work ethic. Why? Because today is probably the best day of the summer and I'm going to spend inside a fucking stinky and filthy building at work. Today I am going to have to pretend like I give a shit about things I can neither control, nor change, instead of sit outside and read a book, go for a walk in the park or any of a million and a half things I would rather be doing than being at work. What's more annoying? I have not had more than three days off in a row ( I know this is not the norm and that we all only usually get 2 day weekends) in a fucking year. I have not asked to take vacation time even though I have a ton of it, and moreover I'm going to let that shit build until they either force me to take it or tell me I either have to take time out or sell some days back to the agency.

Not a cloud in the fucking sky mid to high 80's with a slight breeze. How do you get any better than that? The only way to make that better is to put my ass in a chair on a tropical beach, with an endless supply of diet soda and a stack of good books. I would be ok with not going to work today even if no one was around to hang out. Even if all I did was to sit in my back yard and read in the sun.

This leads into my next point. School.

Can I tell you how not amped I am to have the semester starting in like a week? Not very. The last thing I want to have to do is have all of my waking free time, with my nose in a text book or going over video tutorials or making flash cards. On top of all of that having to spend my other waking hours at a job that I'm torturing myself with school so I can get away from my place of employment, as soon as fucking possible, is not really high on my list of shit to do either. I don't do well when I'm sleep deprived. I mean I can function albeit barely but what's worse is I know that I'm busting my ass to get through nursing school so that I can stop working second shift, only to be an RN and have to start at the bottom and work either second or even third shift until I have paid my dues and a day shift slot opens up.

When the hell did the fun monster come and eat my life? I feel like I've done nothing and do nothing but work. I have not been to the beach once, nor driven down to my parents place because my fucking car will blow up and who has an extra $900 laying around, for repairs, when gas is eleventy billion dollars a gallon?

I'm looking forward to taking the week of Thanksgiving off and going to NYC to see some old friends from school. What's going to be funny is when people bitch and complain about me getting to take a holiday off, after I have not taken more than one day off, and I have more seniority then almost everyone else (barring two guys who have 5 years more time in than me) on my unit. You know what? Go fuck yourself and cry about it to someone who gives a shit, I'm done.

I hope you all are well.