Sunday, January 27, 2013

Where's my tauntaun...

life on Planet Hoth has been rather chilly as of late.

As I walked out of the work the other morning, the cold grabbed me by my bronchi and shook me all the way back to 1997
cause it had been approximately that long since
my breath had been taken away by the weather

shit was cold

even as I struggled to force my airways open
to breathe and nourish my body with o2
a smile made an appearance on my face
a rarity in these times
even though
things are on the upswing


there was a duality in my iceberg moment
being transported back in time
via nostalgia and mister freeze
yet enjoying the painful pleasure
of drastic temperature change
in your lungs
that only winter can bring

I hope you all are well.


Friday, January 25, 2013

Too Many Ghosts...

in the machine.

Time for a reboot, reset, restart

things are a changing
I am back to work
I am back in school
I am not 100% health wise
which is fucking with my mental health
which causes me to doubt and worry
and even when I manage to put the doubt
and worry to bed for awhile
like a good parent
I am ever vigilant
and I know they are still there

being positive is hard
probably one of the hardest things
I've ever tried to do
but I think it's working
and has been beneficial to me


I have to keep going
even though
the class which I am in now
has been known to make people quit the nursing program
even though when the majority of the rest of the country is asleep
I am working
even though
I am not even close to where I want to be in life
I see the footprints behind me
and I recognize I have made progress
and even though it is little comfort
it still steels me and helps me to keep going

I'm no one's motivational speaker
nor should I be
I'm just a guy who has become very,very good
at putting one foot in front of the other
when the going gets tough

I hope you all are well.