Monday, March 21, 2005

Breakfast on the other side of the universe...

Last night #2 and I went out to bask in the easy breeze of conversation. He took me to a new bar, a cool bar, a very small, secluded, quiet bar. We were able to talk to each other across a table and drink tasty beers, which would later come back to haunt me. There were maybe 3 other people in the bar the whole time we were there and the music was very ultra lounge. Lauren, our waitress was both very attractive and attentive and made sure we were never without the proper libations.

#2 asked me my opinion on his long time girlfriend and I told him, "I don't really know her and that the reason she is not a fan favorite, is that we all think she hates us." That explanation seemed to clear up some long-standing tension. It seems #2's girlfriend felt we hated her and therefore communication was always strained at best.

Conversation continued and we spoke about my love life or lack thereof. I regaled #2 with tales of a co-worker, Hot Marlene, and how I was trying to come up with a strategy to have all of the stars and planets align. The more we talked about it, the more I realized I have some deep seeded self esteem and confidence issues. #2's sister is about 4 credits shy of her Ph.d in psychology and I was joking about scheduling a session. I told him I couldn't go after Hot Marlene cause I have no business hitting on someone that hot. He told me I was crazy and ordered more beers.

We drank long into the night and when the bar was closed, we stepped out into the night air new men. The weights had been lifted from our shoulders and the work week could continue. I had to be in work in a mere four hours but suggested a late night breakfast @ Denny's. We jumped in the F1 and screwed down 95 in search of chocolate milk and greasy eggs. We arrived at Denny's and realized we're officially old as the late night clientele resembled the cantina scene from the first Star Wars movie.

A stroke of good luck was granted to us as we walked in and there were many people waiting but since we were but two, we were seated immediately. Our waitress came over and took our chocolate milk / ultimate omelette order and told us she would be right back. She wasn't fucking kidding around cause she walked back into the kitchen and I shit you not, two minutes later, came back with two large chocolate milks and two ultimate omelettes. She placed the food down in front of us and #2 and I looked at the food, looked at her, looked at the kitchen. "Will there be anything else?" she asked. #2 was silent. "I think we're all set" I said still dumbfounded by the fact we had been in the restaurant only five minutes and we had drinks and hot food in front of us.

She left the table and I looked directly at #2, "Dude, is it you or did we just order this food?" Contemplating putting fork to food he looked up at me, "Yeah I was thinking the same thing just now." We both chuckled a bit. "What the fuck is going on in that kitchen you think?" I said and unwrapped my utensils. "Something very bad but I'm too hungry to give a shit right now." and with that #2 cut into his food and began eating. I tentatively watched the first few bites go down. I drank my milk and fiddled around with napkins and condiments. #2 was still alive and I figured it was ok to eat. We eat almost in silence marveling at the cast of characters around us. It was truly awesome. It was as though we traveled back in time to 1993 and no one else seemed to notice.

We finished out milks, paid the bill and jumped back in the F1 to go home. I dropped #2 off and made it home in time to be able to get two and a half solid hours of sleep. When my alarm went off I woke and tried to brush the taste of yak shit out of my mouth. I was convinced I would vomit either before or on the way to work. I also had the sensation of someone shoving a fire hydrant up my ass in the middle of the night. Luckily, I managed to get to the Agency on time, even after stopping for a much needed iced coffee @ Dunkin Donuts, without shitting or vomiting all over myself. It was a long day at work, but I felt like more of a man for having stayed out and lived life the night before.

1 comment:

surly monkey said...

Amen brother!!! The friends always seem to think the girlfriend hates us, when it actuallity (is that a word?) it is a communication deficit. When you get to know the other party they generally turn out OK. Well, unless she really is the psycobitchfromhell then you owe it to #2 to tell him.

Dude, Hot Marlene is not out of your league. You just need to be dogged and confident. I still haven't given up on _itch even though I'm chasing other women.

Congrats on lasting the whole night. That just proves you are the superhero we thought you were.