I still loveyou...

Inevitably you will love someone at some point in your life. Hopefully more than one person and hopefully more than one time in your life. Your heart breaks and eventually heals. It’s whole again but the scar tissue is still there, much like the memories of whatever caused it break in the first place. Sometimes that person has made it to the inside of your fortress of solitude. Other times it’s friends or whether or not you want to admit it, acquaintances…people you just, “kind of know.” Unfortunately family is not immune to making this type of hurt and what’s worse, you never really expect it from people you have trusted for the majority of your life.

The trust which grew over many years, makes the hurt ache and burn and you just wish it would go away and take all the memories surrounding it, with it. Sometimes it’s not possible and you’re forced to face the pain and everything that accompanies it. It’s even more awkward when it’s family. Lately I have tried to ride a family member less and less about things they do or don’t do, because they are just annoying and inconsiderate to everyone else. I’m also working on not getting annoyed by the little things but I will be the first to admit, that shit is hard and I may be having a harder time with that than, not tearing into family like they’re a permanent speed bump.

Now some may say things are not that bad and that the grass is always greener on the other side of the fence and I am not disagreeing with them. I do however, wish they could get a glimpse into what exactly I am saying rings my chimes. All this being said, love your family as much as you can and even more than they deserve. Love your friends as much as you can. Finally, don’t be that person that goes out of their way to make shit harder for everyone else. No one likes having that person around.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,

JJ