Java What???

I wish I could say I woke up like a house on fire and raring to go but truth be told, I basically stayed up all night. See I went grocery shopping and while so doing got a call from Somuchmorethaneyecandy™, she wanted to meet at Brewed Awakenings for coffee. Somuch™ and I haven't hung out in like three weeks so, I was down. I get there maybe 5 minutes before her and the place is packed, packed like the $20 Fung Wa bus from Boston-NYC. Like not an open seat or table in the joint. I scan the joint like a sniper searching for their target. There are plenty of seats but people have their bags, laptops, homework, high school and otherwise piled all over the place, therefore, since almost everyone in there was being an inconsiderate asshole, Somuch™ and I were forced to go down the street to Dunkin Blownuts.

Awesome...

We sat there for a while shooting the shit, talking about this and that and what all I've been up to, I.E. WORK and what she does with her free time, WORK. She asked if I still planned on moving to TN once I'm done with nursing school. I told her I thought so but that nothing is ever set in stone, however, someplace definitely warmer than the NE. She asked me about WV and what I thought about it? I told her, “never been there but not ruling it out.” She confided she was interested in going to gradschool for sports psychology and there was some great program at some small school. Somehow I think this plan as well as others may change, but that is yet to be determined.

Around 6:30 this morning I decided to start getting myself together. I wanted to get some coffee at Timmy's before the masses were up and out in full force. It being Monday, school buses, garbage trucks, recycling trucks and all sorts of other nonsense are on the road. I hoped to beat the rush. I bounced out the door about 7:10, not too late but I needed to get a move on if I wanted a round trip of less than 15 minutes. The wind was the first thing to hit me and sporting only cargo shorts and a sweatshirt, I about shit out my spine from being cold. Spring sure is taking its leisurely fucking time getting here. I fire up the F1 and she responds begrudgingly, there is no time to warm up, I can see the kids walking to their respective bus stops, some wearing coats, some wearing...I don't even know what to call what these fucking kids are wearing.

I tear ass out of the drive way and remember it is no longer Sunday so, rock music has once again returned to the radio. No ipod this AM, not enough time. I listen to two songs from the WBRU three -way: Stone Temple Pilots' Interstate Love Song and “Orange Crush” by REM and postulate the theme of the three-way may be “road-tripping” but you can bet your ass I'm not sitting in my car to figure it out. There will be commercials and banal radio banter before an answer and my time is precious.

Pull into the drive thru at Timmy's and order 2 large HOT toasted almond coffees, LIGHT, sans sucre. That's no sugar for those of you not in the know. Timmy's is a Canadian company and sometimes JackassJimmy has to kick it to them in the native tongue, just to make sure they don't slip him some sugar to take his diabetic ass out. Besides, I reserve my give and take of sugar for the ladies. Yeah, you know what I'm saying... wink*wink*. Pull around, pay and am handed two coffees, out the window, no tray. The girl in the window looks like the last time she went to bed, Alf was still on t.v. I am indeed JackassJimmy and so I give her the wink and say, “Good thing my cupholders aren't filled up with change or anything.” She doesn't get it and I just grab my shit and roll. One cup in a cup holder, the other warming my cockles and killing millions of potential Jackass offspring.

Make it back to the hizzo, not in record time, but respectable. Coffees in hand, jump out of the F1, not thinking, lock keys in car. Karma comes around and tickles my asshole again. Not only did I lock my keys in the car but my dome light is on. I can hear my battery laughing at me. I put the coffee on the front stairs and vow to gut anyone who touches them while I'm gone. Jump down over the retaining wall and pray the cellar door is unlocked. It's not, but the window is. Pull a semi B&E and get in, in one piece. Twig and berries are frosty but I'm ok. Sprint upstairs through the house and to the front door. Open it up to see the trash fuckers spying my coffee. They back off cause JJ has street cred and has been here since Moses wore short pants. Get my toasted almond java and back in the fortress of solitude™. So here I sit, writin', sippin on coffee, eating oatmeal with raisins, it doesn't get much more mid-life crisis than this.

This post was brought to you by the magic of coffee and KEXP 90.3 Seattle.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Manic Monday...

I got nothing for you on a Monday morning so three quick questions to get the blood flowing:

If you could have any music group or musician play at a party, who would you hire?
If money were no object, I would probably get Less Than Jake or The Mighty Mighty Bosstones. If I were have to pay for it out of pocket, maybe Dazy Head Mazy.

Name three things to be happy about today.
Four more days until the weekend.
I'm no longer hungover.
Managed to get a lot of cleaning done yesterday.

How do you release frustration?
Dancing and singing along to good music
Video Games
Exercise
masturbation

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

OUT OF COMMISSION...

So I did something today I typically don't do. I called out of work. I just couldn't deal either physically or emotionally and therefore...I had an unexpected three day weekend. It doesn't seem like it to me because I spent most of my time, doing shit I didn't want to do or thinking about stuff I would rather not have but at any rate, at least I was able to get myself back in semi-working order.

In a couple of minutes I'm going to run to the grocery store and pick up some food. I don't have anything here I think I should put into my body right now and at this point, the 67,000 gallons of water I've consumed since last night are just not doing it for me.

Even though I hate going out, especially to bars/clubs, the highlight of last night was running into Mr. & Mrs. D-fense. I met D-fense while working at Fleet ben Bank of America and we were able to get ourselves through the most torturous job in history. D and I have tried to keep in contact since we went our separate ways but it's been hard. He is now married and when he's not doing the married thing, he's grading papers, as he teaches high school english. I like Mrs. D-fense but like so many other of my friends wives, I get the feeling she doesn't care for me all that much. Anyway, D-fense and I rehashed some of the good ol days and after awhile, he mentioned how much he also hates going, out and how we should get together for some guitar hero or something. Now that, I can get behind.

I'll write more later, but right now I'm on a grocery buying mission.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Damn I miss Winona...

What's up I are drunk blogging. I went out tonight against my will and better judgement and as I sit here and type this, I just finished eating most of a large fries and 5 all the way from, The Avenue Grill.

If you know what Im talking about,the you are either from RI or are cooler than me.

I went to McFadden's tonight and even though it was semi cool, I still would have rather stayed hiome and read a book.

Now all I can think about is passing out and banging out of work tomorrow. Awesome...
thansk booze, yer the bestsz!

No green bere tonight, just Guinness.

I hope you are all well.

Cheers,
JJ

I'm sinking slowly...

1:58 AM and here I sit banging out yet another installment of, “Called Out at Home.”

Earlier, I broke one of the cardinal rules of blogging, at least one of the rules laid down by, “the blogfather.” I revealed my blog to someone I know. Someone who knows me, and more importantly, someone who makes unannounced, guest appearances in my blog. However, as I have been doing more and more things outside of my comfort zone, “fuck fear” I'm still going to write what I think and feel. Those of you and yes, there are more than one, who read about yourselves in my blog and don't dig on what you are reading...

There are a million and one other fucking things you could be doing right now!

Later on tonight I will be going out for St. Patrick's day. Yeah...it's a week early and I fucking hate going out for St. Paddy's day but if I don't the relentless amount of bullshit I will have to endure from my co-workers is going to be more of a price than, enduring the disease that is Providence night-life for a few hours.

Earlier today I played some Guitar Hero II: Legends of Rock. Fun. Then I did some laundry and looked at my hair for awhile. God damn do I want to cut it! Why can't locks of love accept donations of 5 inches? Phone call to a friend, pasta and beans, writing, remembering or lackthereof.

I think I am developing arthritis in my neck and shoulders. Getting older is awesome. U2 playing in the background and I can still hear the absence of the clackity-clack of my fingers banging the keyboard. What would Chuck Bukowski say? He'd probably call me a pussy, punch me in the back of the head, and tell me to have a drink and get back at it. Thanks Chuck, a blow to the head and a drink are exactly what I need right now. Jerk.

What I really need is some warm weather, some good conversation and some peace and quiet time. Maybe on a beach somewhere in the south pacific. Maybe somewhere where there is no internet and I would have to again scribble my thoughts in composition books bought for a few dollars at the local CVS(hate that fucking place) before leaving civilization.

I turn 35 soon and all I want is to be done with school. To be able to move away, start a new job and a new life of peace and quiet and disconnect. A life consisting of work, four walls, good music, better food, great coffee, and solitude. I want my birthday to pass without notice and will do as much as I can to make sure that happens, even if I have to get a court order to seal my records from my boss. Fuck a birthday card and a balloon. I still have to go to work. The last thing I want to have to do is go out with people I don't really like all that much and drink.

Maybe I'm exorcising demons. Maybe that's what all of this, “FUCK FEAR” bullshit is? Maybe it's a last ditch attempt at being cool. I mean like really cool, not just the, “hey, at least my mom thinks I'm cool,” kind of cool.

Now the Goo Goo Dolls are on and the pain that resides in Iowa is called to mind and to be honest, I could care less. People make their beds, dirty and otherwise and regardless, they have to sleep in them. A tired song keeps playing on a tired radio and I won't tell them your name. Or mine or who I once was or hoped to be.


I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Eat it...

A friend recently gave me a topic to expound upon: The Current State of Fast Food in the Ocean State. While at first I was a bit hesitant, after some thought, there are several things I would like to bring up.

It Ain't What It Used To Be: There was a time when you could go and eat at a fast food restaurant, or take it away and not feel as though you were not getting hijacked both financially and nutritionally. Those days seem to be long gone. Has anyone noticed the combo meals, originally designed to, “save time and money” are not really of any value? What kills me is that on the menu, with pictures of exquisite food items, never to reach your hands, the “value meals” are always crowded with that little blurb saying something to the effect of, “get the sandwich for $5.99 or the COMBO FOR $23.99!!!!” It's almost as if these companies are betting on the fact we've become such lazy, non-thinkers, so entrenched in an instant gratification society, that we won't take five seconds to do the math, because those seconds don't come with freedom fries and enough soda to make three small children piss their pants. Corporate America is betting on the fact that we as consumers are going to feel good about shelling out hard-earned cash for something dressed up in bright colors, with tons of exclamation points and cool graphics. “HOLY SHIT!!! THIS IS A GREAT DEAL!!! DON'T MISS OUT BECAUSE EVERYONE ELSE IS BUYING THIS GARBAGE!!!!!” Honestly...

I remember a time when you could get two bean burritos and a drink at Taco Bell for like $2.25. Now I know I sound like Grampa Grouch, someone's dad or just a crotchety old bastard typing things like this but on a recent drive thru experience, not at Taco Bell, I ordered one of the aforementioned “value meals” and my total was something like $9.50. After thanking the squawk-box, drove around muttering to myself, “WHAT THE HELL DID I JUST GET THAT'S $9.50? FUCK THAT RED-HEADED WHORE AND HER FUCKING SQUARE HAMBURGERS!!!” Honestly, I hate the taste of the meat at Wendy's and feel that it's on par with what I think aardvark shit would taste like. If it's Wendy's for me, its chicken. But enough about the economics...

Our Discriminating Pallets: I found out about ten years back that RI is used as a test market by many companies, especially those in the food and beverage industry. Think I'm kidding, go to a Dunkin Donuts outside of the North East and see if you can find the menagerie of bullshit sold at your local Rhody Dunkin'. Flatbreads, pizza, toasted submarine sandwiches, bagel sandwiches, smoothies, kooladas, and generally anything void of any nutrition. There was a time when the double D, sold coffee and donuts, that was it. I can remember being a kid and sometimes accompanying my dad, on his Saturday coffee run. The selection of donuts was wall to wall, but back then, stores were not the size of warehouses to accommodate a million different types of products. Now don't get me wrong, I'm not the selection nazi and I don't think our choices of coffee should be black or not black nor plain or sprinkles for donuts, but the cynic in me does believe we are assaulted with so many choices, that we can be goaded into the more expensive, “tastier, more bang for you buck(wink-wink) options.”

Anyone remember Crystal Pepsi? Probably not since it was an abomination against God and all his children, but I bet the person who pitched it to Pepsi remembers. They probably remember very well because it more than likely ruined their career and they never worked again. My reason for bringing Crystal Pepsi up was that back in 1992, it was test marketed in three cities: Dallas, Denver and you guessed it Providence. Why little Rhody you ask? Due to the fact we have such discerning tastes and also that we don't stand for bologna. Anyhow this seems relevant to me as the quality of fast food nose-dives for the basement. When Domino's pizza first opened up the pizza was not Casserta's but it was good and quick. Now when I hear Domino's, I think Turd in a Box. The same of Papa John's , they were great out of the gate, but now their pizza is of questionable quality. Why pay for the name and get screwed when I can get a pizza exponentially better from a local merchant? If you live in the Providence or North Providence area, two words, GOLDEN CRUST.

Target Market: My friends and I often talk about nothing. We've elevated it to an art form higher than Larry David could ever hope to achieve and food often comes up, as we all enjoy eating. Recently, the airwaves have been inundated with commercials from fast food companies, NOWHERE NEAR HERE, more specifically SONIC. When I went to college in the Mid West, I was introduced to Hardee's and Carl's Jr. basically the same place with a different name. Anyway, back then, coming from an area where Rockdonald's, BurgerSchwing and the aforementioned red-headed whore were our only burger options, Hardee's was a breath of fresh air. I fell in love and maybe it was like being attracted to the punk rock girl in high school, when all of your friends were young republicans or maybe it was just the fact that greasy shit tastes awesome at 3 in the morning, even if it still greasy shit. Long story short. I love drinks. I have always been a drink guy, trying the new Snapple flavors as they came out, the extreme drinks, the fuels, the NO FEARS, basically anything I could get my hands on. Last summer, after about a year of hearing about all of Sonic's 12,000 different drink combinations, I couldn't take it any more. I googled the nearest location: Ephrata, PA 290 miles South West of me. One night, beginning of my weekend, I fueled up the F1 and made the pilgrimage. The food was of great quality for fast food, but the drinks were awesome. I love the fact you can get any drink you want in slush form. Being a diabetic, I also appreciate the fact there is more than one diet/sugar free drink option on the menu. Not only could I get Diet Coke, but Diet Dr. Pepper (FUCK YEAH!!) and an assortment of other non-syrup-laden choices. I went with a Diet Cherry Limeade and to be honest, I've never been much of an -ade fan, but that drink was delicious. I bring this story up only because the commercials nearly drove me fucking insane. Now, I'm seeing commercials for Red Robin, Chick-fil-a and a whole host of bullshit. It's enough to make me throw my television out the window.

So, in conclusion, until we stop paying for shit, we will continue to eat it. Yeah the drive thru is easy but what are you really getting? If you are really after something truly horrible for you, there nothing better than a stop at the N.Y. System for a few, all the way.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Sorry...

Needed to hear the keys under the weight of my fingers.

My Current life:
1. What was the highlight of your week? Friday & Saturday...not working

2. Whose car were you in last? besides mine: JG's

3. When is the next time you will kiss someone? Haley's Comet comes again when?

4. What color shirt are you wearing? blue

5. How long is your hair? Annoying and almost in my mouth

6. Are you good looking? I don't have horns or live under a bridge...

7. Last movie you watched? Into the Wild

8. Who were you with? myself

9. Last thing you ate? Chicken sandwich

10. Last thing you drank? Diet coke

11. When was the last time you had your heart broken? I lost count

12. Who came over last? No one comes over....ever.

13. Are you happy right now? I've been better and I've been worse.

14. What did you say last? "Thank you"

15. Where is your phone? On the desk next to me

16. What color are your eyes? blue

17. Are you left-handed? nope

18. Spell your name without vowels: Jms

19. Do you have any pets? No

20. Favorite Vacation? A what?

21. What do you dislike currently? the cold weather/my job

22. What are you listening to? The keyboard

23. If you could have one thing right now what would it be? The last 12 years of my life back

24. What is your favorite scent? Freshly shampooed female

25. Who makes you happiest? unconsciousness

26. What were you doing at midnight last night? Attempting to sleep

27. When is your birthday? Don't need to know

28. Who has the same phone as you? I'm sure someone does

29. Last time you went swimming in a pool? Sometime last summer

30. Do you read your horoscope? sometimes

31. Where was the last place you bought something? Dunkin Donuts

32. How do you feel about your hair right now? I want it gone

33. Do you bite your nails? no

34. Do you have any expensive jewelery? no

35. Do you have any expensive jewelery? NO

36. Myspace or facebook? Both

37. How fast have you driven a car? 114 mph according to the RISP

38. Have you ever smoked? yes

39. What was or is your favorite subject in school? English

40. Do you have Verizon? yes

41. What type of boy or girl do you usually fall for? It takes someone special or at least someone good at deception.

42. Do you have any hidden talents? Yes

43. Favorite Song? Look What Happened by Less Than Jake

44. Do you like to sing at all? yes.

45. Dream Job? Writer / Blogger

46. Where does most of your family live? RI

47. Are you an only child or do you have siblings? I have a brother

48. Would you consider yourself to be spoiled? Sure

49. What was the first thing you thought when you woke up? Here we go again

50. Do you drink? Socially

51. Know any other languages? no

52. Ever write a coded message? yes

53. Have you ever been IN a wedding? I was the worst best man once

54. Do you have any children? no

55. Did you take a nap today? no.

56. Who has the same birthday as you? Heath Ledger, David Cross, Maya Angelou

57. Ever met anyone famous before? Ethan Hawke, Henry Rollins

58. Do you want to be famous one day? Who doesn't?

59. Any Pet Peeves? Tons

60. Are you multitasking right now? No

61. Do you like Britany Spears? No

62. What is your least favorite chore? Mopping

63. Last place you drove your car? work

64. Ever been out of the country? yes

65. Where were you born? Providence

How in the...

Tell me I didn't feel like the biggest tool box in the world when I accidentally deleted my recycle bin and then was so frustrated trying to find it, I needed to go to bed. God Bless both Google and Yahoo Answers...

After dodging yet anther technological bullet, I'm trying to get back into the swing of this writing thing. I used to be fairly consistent, if not here, at least in college, before the thought of a blog had even dawned on me. Nowadays, if people have things they want to express and want people to see/read them, there is no excuse. Whether it's blogger, typepad, wordpress or even the dreaded: livejournal/deadjournal, the resources for you self expression are available and with a few exceptions, are totally free.

Things at work are tight and getting more constrictive by the second. It seems as though every day I go in, there is another unit or department closing. I think the only reason I still have a job is because I work with the, “worst of the worst.” I guess there is something to be said for that and not everyone could do my job, I just hope I'm around until I'm through nursing school or at least damn close.

I've seen a couple of movies over the past week or so. Here are short and sweet reviews.

Vantage Point: Why? What was the purpose other than to confuse people and rob them of their hard-earned cash. I mean I know Dennis Quaid has to eat, but so don't the movie going public. This film was disjointed and repetitive and in the end, didn't really say anything except, “the terrorists win.” I have to wonder what the directors were thinking about character development for Forrest Whitaker and Sigourney Weaver, because there was none.

Jumper: Cool flick. Plain and simple. Sort of a action/adventure flick that meets The Matrix, but avoids all of the mind-bending philosophy. Good to see Hayden Christiansen back at work in something other then Jedi garb. Christiansen plays the geek, from the dysfunctional family, who somehow learns to teleport through space, thus exponentially improving his life. Nothing life changing of a film here but still very enjoyable. I thought trying to disguise Samuel Jackson as Sisqo or however you spell that R'n'B assholes name, was hilarious. Rachel Bilson was unfortunately cast as Christiansen's love interest and to be honest, she sucks. I hated her on The OC, I will probably go to my grave thinking she is a talentless hack. Jamie Bell's, Griffin was excellent and I think left a door open for possibly a Jumper II or maybe a Griffin spin-off. Obviously there is unfinished business between Jackson's character and everyone else in the film. While I would not be upset paying full price to see this movie, it makes for an excellent matinee or netflix selection.

Bank Job: Who is smoother than Jason Statham? Probably no one, at least in Bank Job. Statham's, Terry Leather is a small time crook, trying to make good for his family. Being connected with the Who's who in the London criminal underground comes in handy for Leather, when a bank heist, too good to resist, falls in his lap. Without giving too much away, this was a very enjoyable film. Had this not been an advanced screening, I would have had no worries about paying $$$ to see Bank Job. Based on true events, Bank Job is a good time, so much so, I might even add it to my netflix queue just to see it again and/or check out the special features.

Into the Wild: While I think Emile Hirsch gives a phenomenal performance here, I wonder if this Sean Penn adaptation of Jon Krakauer's novel, Into Thin Air, was more of a look at how growing up in a totally dysfunctional family affected Christopher McCandless, rather than an expose on his wilderness adventures. The film was enjoyable but towards the end it almost seemed as though you knew the outcome and much like Titanic, you just wanted it to be over. Totally netflix or rent this if you are even remotely interested. Though this is not a spoiler, Into the Wild is not a pick-me-up type of film.

Well, that's about all I have for now. You know what to do if you have something to say.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Life is...

I have things in my head, not that I necessarily need to get out...
but they are in my head none the less.

This post feels forced to me and that's the worst. Writing to write, when you have nothing to say. I find it to be even more idiotic and inane than conversations about the weather, because in reality, I am conversing with myself here. Let's be honest.

I went out for a beer after work last night. Something I don't usually do, but that has become more frequent with recent staffing changes. I had one beer. One beer. I guess you could say I was not in the mood to drink, or maybe it was the company, either way, all I could think of was that, in a bar, at midnight on a Wednesday, was one of the last places I wished I was.

Work really drains me and when I'm done, all I want to do is go home and decompress. I want to throw on a hoodie and some fleecy pants and call it a day. I was at work for like 14 hours yesterday, which probably greatly contributed to my postal feelings when I left. I have another long day today, not 14 hours long, but long enough. At least I am on the brink of my weekend.

Lately, people have been telling me I need to make changes in my life. That I should not be so eager to settle and be done with life. Whatever, walk a mile in a man's shoes, yadda...yadda...yadda.

A couple of days ago, I walked across the street to the convenience store. I was after a cherry soda and some cheese balls. As I took the same path to the cooler I always do, I realized I never pay attention to anything any more. When I actually stopped and looked around, the store that provided me with late night munchies and the latest issues of whatever video game magazine was popular at the time, had transformed and is now a place where people can buy used VHS tapes, fake name brand merchandise, bongs and other grass tacticals and jack-it mags. After that, I couldn't stomach the cheese balls and the cherry soda was, shall we say a little bit bitter. Hooray for progress, right?

At least I'm starting to see more sunshine everyday. Even if not, I still have Less Than Jake right?



I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Come On Heat Mizer!!!

Let it be said right here and right now, I am all FUCKING DONE with Winter!

Winter can go and fuck itself in its filthy, rotten, snow-congested asshole for all I care. NO MORE SNOW THIS WINTER!!!

I'm so tired of shoveling and uncovering my car that I don't care if the planet shrivels up into a fucking dust bowl, as long as there is no more snow. I mean I know it's still winter but we're almost into March and it's still colder than a polar bears asshole, with wind and frigid temperatures and shit. GAHH!!

In other news, work has been fucking crazy as of late, with riots on H Block almost every night. I have been training new people, which basically means I have been working by myself for the last week. Yeah, that's awesome.

It's Sunday here in little Rhody and we all know what that means, there is no rock anywhere on the radio. With the exception of WHJY, which doesn't acknowledge that time has not stopped at 1987, there is no reasonably new rock on the radio, on Sunday. Thank God for my ipod.

After spending what seemed like 45 minutes cleaning the crispity crunchity crust of snow off of my car, I was able to drive to T-Ho's to get a PHENOMENAL cup of coffee and a breakfast sandwich with sausage. I don't normally indulge in the fast food breakfast, but my recent regimen of oatmeal with raisins, has left me desiring something bad. This morning, I had it. G-licious!

I knew I was in for some sideways glances this morning as I pulled around the drive through. I had nail polish on my nails, (easiest way to describe why, is I lost a bet) and had not been able to take it off yet. So, of course I knew everyone who works the morning drive thru at T-Ho's was going to find a reason to come to the window and ask me a question. I was right, about 37 people asked me if I wanted to make my order a combo, or some variation there of. I get it. It's not every AM you get to see some big burly motherfucker wearing nail polish and blaring Lamb of God, in the drive thru. To be honest, I'm sure there are many more strange things than that, but I digress.

Time to get ready for my new and hopefully, improved week of work. I bought some new sunglasses this weekend on the internet. I'm hoping this might motivate summer to get here a little faster.

Any thoughts? Or have I spent my hard earned dollars to look like a douchebag?


I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Fuck lazy assess...

in the goat ass!

Got some stuff I want to say but, I just worked 16 hours straight and I need to finish hammering down this oatmeal and go to bed.

oh and I have to be back to work for 3pm...

AWESOME

I know there was no sentence structure, grammar or syntax going on up above.

Cut me some slack!

Hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

So much to...

read and write down and so little time. Goddamn, I need a sugar-mama to hook me up with some cha-ching. Having to go to work everyday is really putting a cramp in my investigative and creative endeavours.

How did you like my Canadian flavour?

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Just a little...

something to break the monotony.

Yep, it's still really fucking cold.

While I've always been able to wait out Spring without too much anxiety, this year has been a bit tougher. We've been lucky here and haven't been inundated with snow unlike other places in the country, but the cold stretches of weather have been a bit much. I mean here we are mid way through February and it's still very, very chilly.

Not much going on other than work and well..work. I have a new boss and for the most part he seems like a pretty cool guy. He comes in with a background in the type of work that I do, so it's somewhat comforting that I don't have to break in a “newbie” so to speak. Since I've been back with, “the Agency” things have been up and down. Right now things are really fucking stressful and honestly it takes all of my energy to get through a shift, let alone getting frozen in for two in a row.

In other news...

I'm looking for a new doctor. Not that my old doctor was bad, but in the coming months, I'm going to have neither the time, nor desire to drive down the coast probably twice a month. Plus if I were to have to do that, well then, I guess there would be more visits with my parents.

Don't get me wrong, love them to death and wish I could see them more, but sometimes I just really, really need solid blocks of alone time. I don't call my place, “the fortress of solitude” for nothing.

Today is Saturday, February 16th and most of the day will be spent cleaning said, “fos” as it will heretofore be referred to. I'm not the dirtiest guy on the planet, but not the cleanest either. Sometime when you let life get ahead of you, you come home and realize your place is starting to look like one of the residences on COPS. That's probably a good time to start cleaning.

However, I'm not the only person who has let life run away with them, or forgotten what's it's like to be young and have fun. Check this “Dude” out.




While I am in full agreement that Baltimore is a dangerous city, and probably a very tough city to be a police officer in, this “officer of the law” who is sworn to, “protect and serve” did nothing but bully and intimidate. You have to give respect to get it and while the teen in question uttered no profanity or vulgar language, he was probably to frightened to conform to the orders and insults being barked at him. And police officers all over wonder why they get a bad rap. Maybe if dough nut donkeys like Officer Rivieri could spend a little more time in sensitivity training or working with abused kids, he might learn how to speak to people the way he wants to be spoken to.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Sick and Tired...but mostly sick

Hi, you might not know me but my name is Buckley. JJ calls me Buck for short. Jackass Jimmy has come down with a hell of a cold. I gave him some of my awful-tasting cough mixture and he seems to be sleeping, fitfully, in the recliner, right next to this computer. It seems as though JJ has been somewhat lazy in posting, so while he's sleeping let's chat awhile shall we?

So, I guess you check in here from time to time and see if he's written anything. I bet that's disappointing for you most times. It is for me too. The funny thing is, even though JJ(as I like to call him)sees things from the darker side of life, he really has a way of expressing himself that's just hilarious sometimes. Other times well, no one bats 1000%.

Good ol' JJ has been working like a son of a gun! There was lots of overtime last week and not much sleep. I remember him coming home one night a little later than usual, he was acting weird, almost as if he had too much to drink. Then he started calling a text messaging almost everyone he knew. Ha! That boy was on a roll! Lately, JJ has been talking about the new Angels and Airwaves disc. That thing has been on repeat for like weeks. Hopefully, he'll get tired of it soon. It's not that I'm not a fan but in case you didn't know, I'm from Canada and would much rather hear some Our Lady Peace or Tea Party.

I have been telling JJ to get as much rest as he can but, “there are video games to be played and books to be read...” is all he ever says. Poor guy. He works hard all week and when his weekend rolls around, he has to spend the whole thing sleeping, cause he's sick.

Well the constant coughing that was keeping ol' JJ up all night seems to have gone the way of the buffalo. Just shows you that your cough medicine doesn't have to be all filled with sugar or alcohol to work. Granted, I might not taste like a fruit basket, but wouldn't you rather take something that works right away, versus something that tastes good? Me too. I'm going to stop typing for awhile, that big bastard over there is snoring like a drunken hobo and I'd feel bad waking him.

You all have a good night and we'll meet again soon.

As ol' JJ says, “I hope you all are well.”

Cheers,
Buck

Yadda...Yadda...Yadda

So this is the new year...

I finished 2007 strong, working and receiving an A in my nursing class.

2008 has started off somewhat differently.

I'm back to work at: The Agency, different unit, same bullshit. I'm now working the 3-11 shift, which in someways is better for me. I'm often early for my shift, rather than 10-15 minutes late. This does a great deal for my accumulation of vacation and earned time, which is always good. However, even with Fridays & Saturdays off, I still find having a tough time having any sort of a life.

So...

there has been some reading getting done. But, there has also been a ton of sleeping and video game playing. For those of you ensconced in the real of dorkdom like myself, God of War 2, for the Playstation 2, is one bad mama-jama, and better than the first if you can believe that.

My brother recommended Kung Fu High School to me. He's a bright guy with diverse interests, but sometimes I honestly don't know where he finds some of the books he reads. Not your typical novel, KFHS deals with several cliques in a high school who spend their time building body armor, weapons of ass destruction and battling one another. Maybe not to much of stretch of the truth from todays public school systems, but I'm glad I'm light years removed from all of that bullshit.

I should be in school this semester. I'm a procrastinating dumbass and waited and waited and waited to take a test I need to take before I'm able to register for more classes. This is ultimately putting me further behind the eight ball (a place I don't want to be) and will probably force me to spend an additional winter in the beast.

Have I learned? Yes, there will be no more procrastinating as I have crafted daily to do lists. Now if I can only remember where I put it.

Only one day off this week as I have to cover for my 30 year old boss, who is attending a professional wrestling event. What have I done to deserve this?

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

I'm not going to lie, I've been away for sometime. However, what better and more lame of a return to the blog than a MEME? Also, I totally poached this from www.beantowngeek.com Just trying to give credit, where credit is due.

Year in Review meme
1.What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before?

Earned a 4.0 GPA WOOHOO!!!

2.Did you keep your New Year's Resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

I generally don't make them as I have so much going on, I can never remember what they were. However there are some standing orders I have for myself, which I suppose could be considered resolutions. In no certain order:
* Try and make less of me
*Try to cook more and healthier
*More positive self talk
*Be happier
*breathe

3. Did anyone close to you give birth?

Kate and Smitty had a beautiful baby boy

4. Did anyone close to you die?

No.

5. What countries did you visit?

None.

6. What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?

- More Joy.
- Less debt.

7. What dates from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

12.31.07 20 years in the making and well worth it.

8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?

4.0 I was a basket of nerves the whole time but it was for the greater good.

9. What was your biggest failure?

Not taking tests I need to take to make more academic progress and underestimating a Sicilian when death was on the line.

10. Did you suffer illness or injury?

Psoriasis...grrr...Diabetes...double grrr!!! Other than those two, maybe a cold here and there. It was a pretty good year illness wise.

11. What was the best thing someone bought you?

A case of Florida Citrus

12. Whose behavior merited celebration?

W's (not the asshat in office) and the Citrus Queen

13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Moon Man and SP's

14. Where did most of your money go?

Bills, rent, women who have no intention of being anywhere near as good to me as I am to them.

15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?

Fat kid Pilgrimage '07 and 12.31.07

16. What song will always remind you of 2007?
Here in your Arms - Hellogoodbye

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
a) happier or sadder? Overall happier.
b) thinner or fatter? Wee bit thinner.
c) richer or poorer? Poorer.

18. What do you wish you'd done more of?

Traveled, specifically, CA,MN and IL

19. What do you wish you'd done less of?

Worried.

20. How do you plan to spend Christmas?

Same as always friends and family.

21. Did you fall in love in 2007?

You know, being the sap I am, that's a loaded question, but no.

22. How many one night stands?

None.

23. What was your favorite TV program?

Top Chef

24. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

Yes.

25. What was the best book you read?

Women by Charles Bukowski.

26. What was your greatest musical discovery?

Jack's Mannequin

27. What did you want and get?

One of the 12000 drink combinations from Sonic

28. What did you want and not get?

A forever friend...

29. What was your favorite film of this year?

I Am Legend.

30. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

34 and maybe dinner but, my brother took me, JC and W to Fenway Park to see the Sox vs. Yanks and the 4 consecutive home runs!

31. What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?

Not being betrayed by someone I bent over backwards for.

32. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2007?

Have you seen the way I dress? One part tornado, one part college student

33. What kept you sane?

My friends both real and virtual, music and my ipod, my family, and as always...diet soda

34. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?

Keith Olbermann.

35. What political issue stirred you the most?

The non-stop lying and warmongering as well as the democratic infighting.

36. Who do you miss?

Erick, Citrus Queen and pretty much anyone I went to college with, though there are some exceptions

37. Who was the best new person you met?

Hutch, John Stone and Mikey Lo

38. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007?

It's not going to stop.

39. Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:

Don't let the bastards grind you down...

Dashboard Reflectional...

The worst is when you can't tell if you are angry at someone or not. If you want to punch them in the face or make sweet, sweet love to them. It's not often I'm in this state of flux and ergo, why I am having such a tough time dealing. Truth be told, I'm not sure weather this is anger or gasp, dare I say, ”jealousy”... Hey, Jealousy. But I do know it was tough to find a sympathetic ear when I was in tough shape for driving.

Whatever...

Just cause I listen to the same listen music as 17 year old boys, doesn't mean I'm not in touch with or completely lack feelings. I guess as a person who lacks feeling, that's tough to comprehend. My wish for you would be to find some someday. Whether you want to believe me or not, they're not all that bad.

I hope you all are well.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SURLY PUMP MONKEY!!!

Cheers,
JJ

What the fuck...

Is there no intelligent life on this rock?

I've searched maybe not long, maybe not hard, but I've at least searched for good blogs from RI. I don't even include my own blog in the “good blog” category as I update about as much as Courtney Love washes her box, but still...

Are we that devoid of thought and contribution to force me to pay for a subscription to deadjournal, so I can link to teens from RI, who write consistently at least, albeit over who sucks less cock, My Chemical Romance or The Used...

Most of the blog directories I have found have offered carbon copy links. I've even gone through some of my tried and true “go to” links and have come back with nothing.

I suppose I could be like every other person who just wants hits and link to Dooce, but I have a bit more pride than to link to someone I don't know and more importantly, someone I don't read on a consistent basis.

Then there is the, “link to Rhode Islander's on myspace.” Yeah, file that under fuck that. Real bloggers don't blog on myspace. Though I suppose Mystery Cookie and other might argue. Really, how can one argue with someone with the moniker, Mystery Cookie?

Once I have some technical issues taken care of, I'm not promising anything but I am going to make a concerted effort to make my blog, one of the better ones in RI.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
jG

Now that things...

Are back to normal and the Boston Red Sox are World Champions again, things such as sleep can again have a place in my life. There are few things harder than getting to work for seven-am, when your favorite baseball team kept you up until two-three (sober or not so much) in the morning. However, since I am pretty sure I will be layed off within two weeks, 10-15 minutes late is not going to keep me up at night.

Anyway...

While at work this weekend, I overheard part of a funny phone conversation. Someone who recently came to work on my unit, has turned out not only to be funny, but generous and a good person to boot, was having a conversation about music with someone on the phone. While I can usually do a great job of tuning anything out, what I am about to write here made me laugh out loud.

Co-worker: Yeah I think so, no I'm going to buy the Something Corporate.

Friend on Phone: .....

Co-worker: I don't know, I've never really heard them before.

Friend on Phone: .....

Co-Worker: No, they aren't.

Friend on Phone: !!!!!

Co-Worker: No, They Aren't! Dashboard Confessional are not just for fat, white girls from Wisconsin!!!


At this point, the coffee I was drinking almost shot out of my nose at the speed of light. I apologized as soon as she hung up. I then explained going to college in SE, Minnesota, I knew many white girls, fat or not from Wisconsin. I continued to explain that while her friend's observation was astute, it was somewhat off the mark. White girls from Wisconsin are more of the Dave Matthews, Jason Mraz, Jack Johnson ilk.

Then we both had learned something and also had a good laugh.

Today W returns from his trip to the dirrrty south, which is good cause shits were getting boring around here. I also have to write a paper on growing trends in health care and how they will affect my job and society as a whole.

Anyone want to make some quick $$$?

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

GO SOX!!!

So last night I took a mid-term. I studied probably enough but not as much as I would have liked. either did really well or really bad on my exam.

As she was handing our exams out, my prof reassured everyone by telling us, "Not to worry because, if we didn't perform as well as we should, we could work something out.

Now don't get me wrong, I like a do over as much as the next guy, but when my class consists of sitting in a hot room, for two and a half hours on a Tuesday night, reading through copies of a power point presentation, verbatim...I wonder what it is I paid for at the beginning of the semester?

Having already attained a degree, I am familiar with the entry level courses having a much higher percentage of "hoop-jumping" but this just seems a bit ridiculous to me.

You know what else grinds my gears? Perfectly healthy young men, who carry their books and materials in those fucking backpacks with wheels. Are you going to class or on vacation?

-END RANT-

If you are looking to listen & discover new music, check this out! It's totally Jackass approved!

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Slamazon...

I know I always bitch and complain about the battles I have with amazon but, I just found an out-of-print cd, that I have been searching for, for sometime, for $6.

Used, yes, used. I love buying used cause fuck the RIAA! I'm not stealing it, I'm paying for it and you can bet your ass it's going right on my ipod.

So now that my retail therapy has been completed, its off to study.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Hi there...

I have to tell you, one of the skills I've learned as an adult is patience. Not the Gun's N' Roses type but the kind that only makes me think about stabbing stupid people in the morning coffee line.

However, there are still somethings that make me cringe like a 5 year old, anxiously awaiting Christmas.

1. Having to wait for the sporadic release of my favorite comic book, Fell. I was never really into comic books enough to create a long-term interest, but this book by Warren Ellis & Ben Templesmith is great.

2. Borat: Fuck this guy in the ass with Shaquille O'Neal's dress shoes. Not funny...NOT FUNNY...NOT FUNNY!!!

3. Missing Concerts: Interpol, still not over this one. Waited forever to see them and low and behold of course...plans get fubar'ed.

I'm not going to make this post an extended rant cause, well why should I waste any more of your time?

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

why...

study for a midterm when you can go vacuum cleaner shopping and spend time with the one who, you are sure will eventually rip your heart out via your ass?

It is said that behind every good man is a better woman. I'm not sure if better or craftier is more appropriate. I am sure that I don't want to go to Field of Screams or any of that halloween bullshit tonight.

The things we put up with for love/lust/napping partners.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

not dead...not yet

...sometimes reading about women or watching them in movies or television is just better for your sanity than the real thing. I hung out with my favoritest of lady friends today. Tonight she wanted to jump in the F1, plug in the ipod and just go.

Who am I to say no?

and in my attempt for power and glory, I nearly disembowled the F1 and left my favoritest to spend the night with another man in her bed.

good times...good times.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

The Grind...

Eight minutes to midnight. Sounds like the title of a shitty eighties metal song. Either that or I am starting to lack in the originality department.

I'm going with a lack of originality, it's not like there have been any new ideas in the last 100 years. Ok, as far as an update is concerned...

My job fucking sucks.

Wait, no, that's not quite right. My job is fine, the idiots I work with are making me not want to go to work anymore. Last time this happened,
I ended up leaving a, “fuck you & good bye” letter on my bosses desk, late on a Sunday afternoon. I mean it's still an option but since I have
three years in, I should at least give two weeks so I can use hell as a reference.

Actually, I'm pretty sure I'm staying employed by hell, just making a lateral move to another department. The good thing about Hell is there are
many, many places to work. Never a dull moment if you know what I mean. The prospect of earning a full-time paycheck while I train for a
big boy job is somewhat gratifying. I mean sure, I'm going to have next to no social life for two years, but shit, I've almost done that for the better
part of 15 years, two should be a walk in the park.

If anything, being back in school, learning, using my brain will probably help me to not feel so stuck. Yes, there will be a plethora of women in
my program, but I really am focused on getting through school as soon as possible. Nursing is not a cake walk and I'm sure there are going to
be nights and days where I wish I had hair left to rip out. At any rate, when I make it through, I can work anywhere in the country and make a
good living doing it.

Plans for independence day are as follows:

6:00am Wake up
6:15 wake up again
6:20 get in shower/wash filthy ass
6:30 dry and dress/shave and brush
6:40 take pills/sigh/gel hair
6:50 turn on computer/glance at news
6:55 leave for work
7:00 get iced tea at T-Ho's
7:05 Arrive at work 5 minutes late.
7:10-8:10 Try and wake up
8:30-3:00PM put up with inane bullshit from co-workers
3:00:01 punch out and leave work
3:30 drive to brother's fiances families house
4:00 do cook out type stuff
9:00 Drive home
9:20 Check email/screw around on interweb/read
12:00 go to bed.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

I've lost that loving feeling...

I'm not going to lie, it's gone...gone...gone.

Even with all of the other nonsense going on in my life, I'm usually good about being able to turn it off and go to work.

Not so much as of late.

I can't see giving 110% to a place that just beats you until you break. Now, I'm not broken, but I'm getting there.

That having been said...

It's time for a graceful exit and time to move on to hopefully greener pastures.

I've been told a change of latitude will help my attitude, this may also be true. Fuck it, it is true.
I'm trying to pick out a date and just go. While I will miss my home, a whipping boy no more will I be.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Bent over again...

It's 9:00AM on Saturday morning and it feels and sounds as if the whole world went out drinking last night. Not that I mind, it's just odd, cause normally I don't notice it. Normally, I am at work. Normally. You see today is special. Today I am taking a Saturday off. I am not working today because I'm upset with my place of employment. So much so, I don't mind burning a vacation day to not be there.

After three years of loyal service, I was passed over for a promotion I was told was going to be mine. I was told this not once but twice, (off the record mind you) by the hiring manager and this job, for all intensive purposes, should have been mine. See they decided to go with someone who has only been employed with the Agency for seven months. Seven months, versus three years...you see where I'm going with this?

Not only does this person not possess the qualifications necessary to even apply for the job, but they lack the skill and finesse necessary to get it done well, the way it needs to be done.

As a result, here I sit in my boxers, on a Saturday morn, drinking iced coffee and blogging, trying to figure out whether I am going to buy guitar hero or one of those things you can dock your ipod in, while you charge and listen to it. All of these things better than being at work on a Saturday.

I hope you all are well.


Cheers,
JJ

Honest Bloggers Quiz...

1. which political party do you typically agree with? democrat

2. which political party do you typically vote for? democrat

3. list the last five presidents that you voted for? Kerry, Gore, clinton, clinton, don't think I was old enough to vote previously

4. which party do you think is smarter about the economy? democrat

5. which party do you think is smarter about domestic affairs? democrat

6. do you think we should keep our troops in Iraq or pull them out? Should have been gone a long time ago

7. who, or what country, do you think is most responsible for 9/11? obl and the bush family.

8. do you think we will find weapons of mass destruction in iraq? even if we did, no one cares anymore. too many civilians and troops on both sides have died.

9. yes or no, should the u.s. legalize marijuana? yes.

10. do you think the republicans stole the last presidental election? yes

11. do you think bill clinton should have been impeached because of what he did with monica lewinski? no.

12. do you think hillary clinton would make a good president? yes.

13. name a current democrat who would make a great president: hillary

14. name a current republican who would make a great president: mccain

15. do you think that women should have the right to have an abortion? yes.

16. what religion are you? Christian.

17. have you read the Bible all the way through? no

18. what's your favorite book? Boys Life, Robert McCammon.

19. who is your favorite band? Hammock

20. who do you think you'll vote for president in the next election? whoever the dems put up.

21. what website did you see this on first? tonypierce.com + busblog

Times are a changin'...

I believe it was Snap who said, “It's getting, it's gettin, it's getting' kinda hectic!” Much like George Washington, I cannot tell a lie. It is getting kinda hectic.

See my boss decided he no longer wanted to be a boss anymore. He decided he wanted a different job, more responsibility, something to keep it interesting for him. Nevertheless, J-Unit needed a boss, and since I have been there since day one, we all know who the likely candidate for the job is. That doesn't always mean the most likely candidate wants the job. I mean don't get me wrong, having every other weekend off and a bump in pay so small that a gnat's dick laughs at it is one thing. Being at work for almost 12 hours a day, that just sucks ass.

It does look as though I will be getting the job. The powers that be have crowned me acting supervisor as of right now with no potential dark horse candidates. We shall see...

In other news...

Last Saturday I was witness to something I never thought I would see in my life time. I went to a breast cancer benefit and saw local rock legends Kilgore Smudge, reunite and play for the first time in about twelve years. The show itself was nothing short of heaven. Original members, J. Berndt, Bilgore Southerland, Brian McKenzie and Jay “Smitty” Smith took the stage and brought the loyal folk of the Providence alt-rock/hardcore scene back in time. Playing a set list that welcomed fans new and old Kilgore showed rock and rock that quality does stand the test of time. Not only was I helping out boobs all over the world, but, I saw people I haven't seen in years. All in all it was a great time and I highly recommend anyone catch Kilgore's probably last show ever, July 7th at The Livingroom, Providence, RI. Kilgore will be playing the now back from the dead, State of Corruption, another band of great guys. So come on out, have a few drinks and be treated to some phenomenal fucking music.



I hope you all are well.


Cheers,
JJ

In absentia...

Yeah...

so there was something of an unexpected absence as of late. It's not that I've not had anything to say, or at least I'd like to think that. It's more of my head has been so busy spinning around in circles, that most days I don't know whether to shit or go blind.

Work has been a bit of a challenge lately both in the actual work I do and in all of the politics which surround it. I know in past postings I have alluded vaguely to what I do and it's not that I can't talk about it, it's more of there are so many privacy issues with the type of career I'm in, it's just easier to take some, “creative license” when speaking / blogging about work.

At any rate, due to budget cuts, “the Agency” is struggling financially and this just makes for a very unpleasant work environment. When you tell people who already don't make squat for a paycheck, they will not be receiving a raise this year, well...there is just no good way to do it. People are understandably upset, and I am one of those people. However, I happen to be someone who has been with my program and unit since it was opened. I have seen things be a lot better and I have seen things be much worse.

What I try and remind people of is there are a wealth of people, who work for the same Agency, who make about half of what we do, and still have to come to work everyday. So while things are not always hunky-dory, they could be worse.

My boss has decided to take another position, and rather than wait and see who they would give command of the unit to, I have thrown my hat in the ring for unit supervisor. It's not much of a bump in pay for the amount of responsibility I am taking on. Basically the only perk is that I would be earning another week of vacation time and having every other weekend off.

To be honest, I really like having Sunday / Monday off but I guess the whole saturday / sunday thing won't be too bad. There is a lot of down time on the weekend and as the old proverb states, “idle hands do the devil's work.” While I'm not overjoyed at the prospect of taking the ships wheel, I would rather take it that have to train some asshat greener than the rolling hills of Ireland.

That having been said, I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Respect Due...

I have been fortunate enough to see both of these gentlemen tear it up in an intimate environment. While moving, this performance does not do their talent justice.

enjoy!

Easter Beaster...

Lots of watching and reading going on this week. Though I was tired, like I was beaten with a sock full of nickels, I was able to finish The United States of Wal*Mart. While it was an entertaining read on one of the lyingest of lying liars of corporate America, having worked for the devil itself, there really was nothing I didn't know. I was however shocked and surprised at the rate at which Wal*Mart is growing. John Dicker, the author, did a good job of investigating some of the seedier business practices Wally-World would rather you didn't know. For that alone he should be commended.

When not reading about the evil of that fucking Smiley-faced roll back the prices and not pay anyone a livable wage bastard, I watched Will Ferrell's reasonable new film, “Stranger than Fiction.” A drama-dy, I was a bit hesitant going in. I thought this was going to be another of those “Saturday Night Live guys, who have made some cash with comedies and now want to try some real acting...but fail miserably” movies. Ferrell blew me away with his ability to not be “Frank the Tank, Elf, Ron Burgundy” or any of the other cast of village idiots he is so well known for. STF, is about an IRS agent, Harold Crick, who is literally the main character of a book being written by struggling writer, Karen Eiffel, played by Emma Thompson. Ferrell is a chronically boring IRS agent with an ability for figures, slight OCD and the ability to bore anyone with the unfortunate luck to run into him. Not until Ferrell is assigned to audit the books of ex-ivy-league law student- turned anarchist baker, Ana Pascal, played by Maggie Gyllenhaal, does Ferrell wake up and realize, he has missed most of his life. Ferrell's realization coupled with the fact he feels he is going insane, due to the voices in his head, make for a very interesting film. The cast also includes Queen Latifa, Dustin Hoffman and Tony Hale, who most will know as Buster Bluth, from the ridiculously canceled Fox comedy, Arrested Development. STF moves slowly at times but overall I felt the ending was worthy of my time.

I also attempted to watch, The Illusionist this week but found this was more of a vehicle for a fitful nights rest, than anything else. One should not look at this film and be comforted by the fact both Edward Norton and Paul Giamatti signed on for this film. I know most consider Jessica Biel to be a case full of eye candy, but she can't act her way out of a paper bag and if she has squandered the money she made on 7th Heaven, then she deserves to go down in obscurity with any movie shot in the year 2006 in sepia-tone. I don't know if the producers thought people would think this is a clever trick or that no one would notice. NEWSFLASH: if the film is slow and quiet, having a dark tone is only going to encourage people to sleep even more!!!

Friday night, I went to a showcase of superhero plays, written by child authors, sponsored by the Manton Avenue Project. The works were well crafted and funny but a night of children's theater can leave one yearning for some intellectual stimulation.

Work has been well work and though there are lay-offs all around, my position seems to be safe for the time being. That does not mean I have stopped looking for a big-boy job because as my 340th birthday approaches, it would be nice to be paid like an adult for once in my life.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Catch Up...

At a time when I don't think I have ever been more broke in my life, it's odd to me I am as happy as I am. Maybe I just think I am happy, or maybe this is some sort of really intense and elaborate dream? One I will wake from and discover the life I live now has all been the product of a fitful nights sleep. I will wake and be married with 2.5 children, a house in the sticks and a golden retriever or two. How the hell does someone have 0.5 children anyway?

It's Monday and I am supposedly going to the mall in about an hour or so with Princess. I really have no love for the mall, especially Providence Place. The parking garage alone is enough to cause seizures in the most patient of drivers. That coupled with the fact this mall in particular attracts the pillars of society, just make me wish I could somehow dodge this bullet. If nothing else, I will get to hang out with Princess, maybe have some lunch and overall be more social and possibly productive than if I were to stay at home all day.

Last week I went and saw The 300. It was entertaining and had something for everyone. I recommend it as a date movie for people who have been dating awhile. There were plenty of fine examples of men, who worked out way to hard to get roles, needing no acting ability whatsoever. In contrast to this, the amount of combat and violence in the film is such that it will hold even the simplest of knuckle-draggers attention. While it was entertaining, I was glad I caught it mid-week at the showcase and payed only $6. Had I been an unfortunate soul, who took in the film on opening weekend and payed $10.50, I might have been somewhat more disenchanted with The 300 overall.

Other than that, not too much has been new. I am looking for an "in addition to" job to supplement my kingly salary at "The Unit." Something mindless might be what I'm looking for, but at this point, as long as I'm not scrubbing a toilet or picking up after people with 2/3d's less IQ points than me, I'm ok with whatever the job might entail. Ah...America! What a country.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Monday Winter Haiku

Old Man Winter sucks
like a bus station hooker
snow in March is gross

Case of Mundays....

[Is this good for drinkin?]



I awoke this morning in a haze something like Sunday mornings in college. All I could remember from my slumber was, whilst I slept, I joined Sarah McLachlan's All Clarinet Orchestra and the George Dubya, had recommended I have little chocolate donettes for breakfast.

Pondering the source of said advice, I had a fresh mango and about 4 glasses of water. The older I get, the longer it takes for this jackass to recover from the weekend. As much as I love going out with the girls, sometimes getting, "girl-drink-drunk," it's not always the best plan for me. However, true to superhero form, I was able to be witty and charming as I battled my arch-enemy...gravity, while drinking my favorite black wrath, as if they were never going to make it again.

Work on Saturday was a mild annoyance. Even though there was not much hullabaloo on J-Unit, the fact I was not able to be home, on my porch, reading a book and sleeping of the remainders of a hangover, made me somewhat perturbed. Then again there are worse things in life. I was actually able to get out of work almost on time, which was great because, this guy needed to crash and burn like no other.

Saturday night I watched a very gritty but good documentary called, "Dark Days." It wasn't exactly the feel good film of the year but it does give a great look into the staggering problems of poverty, drug abuse and homelessness in NYC. There really is not too much to say about this film without giving everything away. If you are into documentaries or just things to raise your social consciousness, it will be up your alley. However, I do need to mention the audio levels were somewhat low in part, making things tough to hear. Visually, Dark Days is well...dark, but then again you are living underground.

Yesterday I spent snoozing in and out of consciousness. I was awake just long enough to get the garbage out and then more sleep. I think my body is trying to fight off the impending doom of infection which seems to encircle me every time I go to work. The coughs and hacks of co-workers and inmates alike is enough to make Julia Child roll in her grave. Now on the final day of my weekend, I have to go into work for a stupid unit meeting.

How much fun is that? I tell you, nothing but savages in this town.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Babylon...

Tonight I was jolted by a thought, maybe even a memory. You always have to be wary of the shuffle feature on whatever your music player of choice may be. If you are not careful, it might just throw you that third strike, curve ball you were sure you were going to take...downtown. While engaged in the many pursuit of purchasing hygiene products from the body shop, (screw you, I like to smell nicey) Dar William's, "If I wrote you" came up. I have heard this song a dozen or so times over the past few months, it must have been on as background music, or maybe I was engaged in writing or whatever, but I don't think I actually heard the song.

Tonight...I heard the song. It was a kin to something like a sucker punch. It brought back memories of college, more specifically of Heidi, the one who got away. Why Heidi got away is debatable, but for now I am choosing to place the blame on myself and fear. Fuck fear. For what it's worth, Heidi was one of the few people who I could honestly be me with. I'm sure I've crafted many a tale of lament about Heidi in previous posts, so if there is anything anyone wants to know, email me, otherwise I will try to put this one to bed. What is most ironic about tonight, the song title, my memories of Heidi and about a million other things, is we used to email all the time. The messages were something I'm sure we both checked our inboxes frequently for. I know I did.

After we last saw each other, after my heart was broken and after the last of my money had been spent on a fucking bus ticket, there were no more emails. There were no more phone calls, no more care packages, nothing. Maybe a better way to look at it would be to say, "there were no more lies." Heidi told me she had never said certain things to me because she was thinking about my feelings (and deep down inside I honestly believe that.) So tonight when Ms. Williams asked if she wrote the object of her affection, the breaker of her heart, the recipient of her letter, and answered her own question with, "you will not write me again" I started doing what I do best and deconstructing any defense I might have developed in regard to this matter.

The, "what-ifs" and "just one emails" bandied about in my head and in the end I said, "fuck it." Nothing good would come of it. I would write, she would respond and tell me how fucking great her married life is even though it's everything she told me she never wanted. I would fake happiness for her and maybe the emails would continue for a few weeks, but in the end what would I have accomplished beyond opening wounds I have done a good job of healing?

Even more funny, and I think, "the fates" have it out for me tonight, I wrote this post whilst listening to David Gray, the concert I went to at Madison Square Garden. The concert I emptied out my bank account for to buy tickets for both Heidi and I. The concert I attended alone, cause someone couldn't get out of work. Mr. Gray helped me through a rough time before and has done so again. For that I'm grateful. Slainte, Mr. Gray!!!

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Haiku Monday..."Tribute to Rude"

diabetes means
spending your day in numbers
always hated math

Days go by...

I've never called myself a quitter, unless we talk about the time I took ice skating lessons early on in my life. Someone
just should have told me that was a bad idea and left it at that. The reason I mention quitting is, today I was expected to
be at work, and while I did not quit my job, I did call out sick. I mean every now and again, I think we all can say we need
a mental health day and to be perfectly honest, I was due. Things around the local grind have been fairly hectic and as I
have been the defacto boss, as my boss and my bosses boss have been on vacation or choosing to not come to work,
yours truly decided to take a long weekend.

In other news...

I would like to extend belated congrats to some of my favorite Minnesotans, Mary and Kevin H. Newly proud parents to
a health baby boy, I wish their family and friends all the best.

Moving right along...

Weather hasn't totally sucked as much this week. It's still cold but it did actually get warm enough for the second ice
age that surrounded my house to all but disappear. This is good as there are new gutters being put on. I watched the
special edition of Boondock Saints this week. Even if it was not the special edition, that film will always be special to
me. Sean Patrick Flanery is just a great actor. When you sit there and know you know someone from another film
but just cant place it, but they are not wearing any outlandish makeup or costuming, thats some good acting.

I have been experiencing somewhat of a drought of good tunes. Anyone listening to anything good? Anyone have
any suggestions for this jackass?

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Dispatches from home...

I originally started crafting this post about 20 hours ago. However, due to fucking technical difficulties, I had to stop.
In case you were wondering, no one in the state of rhode island has rock salt. I even set foot into the wal*mart, I was
fired from a decade ago, in hopes of finding something to melt the layer of ice, literally covering ever square inch of my humble abode.

No dice. I did however see several people who I worked with while I was still employed by wal*mart. I hate to be the naysayer but it seems to me none of these people have any aspirations for themselves if they are still there. Even with
the profit sharing, vesting and stock options, it's not like these people are going to be able to retire on what they are making. Now maybe I am being hasty and they are there because retirement plans have already been made, and they are just making extra money to blow at Foxwoods, Mohegan Sun or *gasp* Lincoln Park.

I received a call and email from my Citrus Queen this weekend. She wanted to check in with me and see how the week end was going, since the rest of the week was not all that stellar. CQ informed me a mutual friend and my collegiate roommate, was looking for someone to share an apartment in May. Normally I would jump at the chance to be reunited with DG but I have my health and student loans to consider. Once again, I can bend over and smile. Plus to be honest,the thought of moving to, "the windy city" when all I really want is to move south, seems kind of counter productive.

Still, hooking up with DG again would be interesting.

Anyone know of a good, licensed massage therapist in RI or surrounding MA? My neck and shoulders are turning into something akin to titanium and I'm not sure what to do about it. All I know is the pain is starting to get to me. *Yawn*
I guess it's time for a little more reading before bed.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

A Little's Enough...

When all is said and done
Will we still feel pain inside?
Will the scars go away with night?
Try to smile for the morning light
It's like the best dream to have
Where every thing is not so bad
Every tear is so alone
Like God himself is coming home to say

I, I can do anything
If you want me here
And I can fix any thing
If you let me near
Where are those secrets now
That you're too scared to tell
I'd whisper them all aloud
So you can hear yourself

Green trees were the first sign
The deepest blue, the clearest sky
The silence came with the brightest eyes
And turned water into wine
The children ran to see
The parents stood in disbelief
And those who knew braced for the ride
The earth itself then came alive to say

I, I can do anything
If you want me here
And I can fix anything
If you let me near
Where are those secrets now
That you're too scared to tell
I whisper them all aloud
So you can hear yourself

I'm sorry I have to say it but you look like you're sad
Your smile is gone; I've noticed it bad
The cure is if you let in just a little more love
I promise you this, a little's enough

(Just a little...)

Nothing but Savages...

I'm sitting and typing and not really sure where I'm going with any of this. Most of me wants to scream until my vocal
chords are caked with dried blood. It has been a Monday. One of those Mondays that makes you want to crawl back
into bed and pull the covers over your head. A Monday that makes you want to fall back asleep and never wake up.

As of late things had seemed to be improving: no more depression meds, sleep habits more regular and life in general
just seemed semi-normal. I was pushing myself to move beyond my comfort zones. I was taking risks, whether or not
I thought they were going to pay off. I was actually starting to *gasp* enjoy myself.

Normally, when the hammer drops, I can sense it coming. Today it came special delivery...in the form of a fucking
car accident. A mere year and a half after my last accident, again I got hit coming out of my driveway. I love how
it is soley my responsibility to make sure there was no traffic coming. I did that. No one gave a citation to the
motherfucker who parked thier fucking jeep, half on the sidewalk-half on the street. No one asked if the driver of the
other vehicle was speeding. No one asked if anyone but me was at fault.

Gratefully, no one was hurt and damage to my car is minor. Of course I had to hit a BMW 325i, fresh from the body
shop, with an insurance agent as a passenger. People have been telling me all day, it was an accident and while I
agree, that doesn't make it suck any less, nor my insurance any cheaper. I can't afford collision now, so with this little
opportunity, it is most definetely out of my price range.

In other news...

The co-worker, who is no longer a co-worker, who I asked on a date, has either been to busy to return my call or was
just placating my offer and never had any intentions of meeting me for brunch, coffee, or several stiff drinks and a
meaningless make out session. I haven't decided whether or not I'm going to make a last ditch effort to connect with
her. I mean I know how busy life can get when changing jobs, but part of me feels as though I should have gleened
some message in txt message and call not returned.

Does anyone know where the well-read, single women hang out?

Up until about 2 O'Clock today I was considering an ibook. As my car made impact with the beamer, I watched the
ibook fly away on wings of insurance paper work. All things considered I'm doing ok with this latest monkey wrench
in my works. I'm on the brink of financial ruin and to be honest the only way I can see to solve the problem is to have
two of my "almost grown" male friends move in with me. I'm approaching 35 and yet, my life still resembles that of a
shitty Vince Vaughn / Luke Wilson film.

What makes matters worse is when you realize you're fundamentally a great person and yet you watch everything
crumble around you. It's enough to make someone ponder the sense of walking the path of the righteous man.

With any luck, Tom DeLonge and Angels & Airwaves will calm me enough to sleep. Back to the salt mine tomorrow.
What a great fucking weekend.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

You know...

One thing I've noticed...

I don't get the hits I once used to. I understand why. I mean it's simple really, this guy doesn't blog like he used to. This
guy doesn't do a lot of things like he used to but if empty promises are at all reassuring, this guy is going to try and blog
more or regularly

or

maybe more regularly, which may require several cups of coffee and some delicious bran muffins, of which I'm not allowed.


However, that is another story entirely.

I suppose I could bolster my hits by begging people to read my blog via myspace. Maybe a mass email to all of my
friends would help as well. I'm sure the inclusion of the phrases, "Free Ring Tones" or "Girls Who Hate Cock" would also
do the trick, alas I have never been one for smoke and mirrors.

As for me...

Things are good. The one you want never calls you back. Work, student loans and death are all inevitable parts of life.
Responsible drinking is a good thing, especially if you have a tendancy to drunk dial, (as I do.) More salad and less
burritos make less jackassjimmy, which is also a good thing. Time to read and catch up on some zzzZZZZ's.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Brrrrrr......!

I'm not a plumber, nor do I play one on tv. However, I was able to relight the pilot on my stove today. This is a great
and wondrous thing as it's colder than an eskimo's asshole today. I can only imaging it getting colder tonight and by
relighting the stove, at least I know the pipes in the house won't freeze. At any rate...

Winter: 265, 217

JackassJimmy: 2

TGIAF! Here in my world, today is thursday. While the rest of "normal" society celebrates the end of the work week, I
have one more day to go. Do I get mad? Does this aggrevate me? Not normally, because of having to work on Saturday,
I never, ever have a case of, "the mondays." There are more than a few perks to not working in corporate america.

Went out with bscrazy after work today. We grabbed coffee and then went to music magik. I bought her the Clumbsy,
by Our Lady Peace. I think if you are a fan of good, rock music, not the shit on the radio now, Clumbsy is definetly a
disc you need to own. I also picked up TSAR's self titled debut. While it's not as edgy as Band Girls Money, it's catchy
and is helping to fuel this post. I'm thinking about going to target and staples tonight to pick up the rest of the ink I need
to get my fucking printer to work. I also want to buy another floor lamp. In doing so, I will be able to sit in the WARM
basement and read.

Sunday I'm going to ask a coworker out for coffee. This is not someone I work with on a regular basis and it's someone
with whom I will never work again. Her last day is Sunday and it's fourth and 3 and I'm Tom "motherfuckin" Brady. Never
let em' see you sweat. In addition to that conquest, there has been some serious flirting going on at work. I guess it's just
the nature of the beast. I have to admit, sometimes it makes it difficult to keep my head in the game but, if nothing else,
it keeps you on your toes.

I'm torn between cooking and reading tonight. Either way, there is going to be some shopping to be done. If I cook, I want
to wait so that I can subject bscrazy to my culinary prowess, even if she is very, very wary. I hate driving on Friday night
to go shopping. Too many assholes, too much traffic, too much nonsense.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

How About Them Apples...

Dear Epson and the people who write the software for the Epson brand printers.

To Whom It May Concern:

I have been a loyal customer for some time. I have backed the Epson brand and recommended it to friends and colleagues alike. Recently I have become frustrated with the labeling of your ink cartridges. As I am probably one of the most cynical people I know, I find it some what of a coincidence that the refills for the C68 printer and the C86 printer are placed remarkably close together. What am I getting at? Well after spending close to $70 at Staples on replacement ink, I came home, unwrapped and installed my new cartridges, only to find I was shit out of luck because, I had bought the C68 refills and not the C86.

So what is a guy on a budget to do? Well since the cartridges all fit into place, I was remotely optimistic they might work. What a fool I was! What type of evil corporate and technological sorcery have you people bewitched your products with that if an honest mistake is made, one cannot come back from the void?!?!? Are you so heartless as to give everyone the finger? What about all of the hardworking, blue-collar Americans, who purchase your products because they are both economical and reliable? Are we to assume that once you have our money, we are just dollar signs and decimal points to you? I would hope not but my cynicism leads me to believe otherwise.

So tonight, I ventured back to my local Staples to pick up a single, black ink cartridge. One that would let me print out important documents for: tax purposes, medical records and shopping lists; you know everyday kinds of things. Upon returning home I installed my new Epson brand cartridge and voila, guess what? My printer still will not fucking print! Why is this? Hmmm, let me go to your website and see what the great minds have in store for me. Looking through the FAQ's it seems once again I get to bend over and be railed by corporate cock. My fucking printer will not print, unless I have all cartridges installed, and they all have to have ink. So basically, whenever I need to buy ink for this marvel of technology, it's going to cost me the cost of the printer.

I will admit, I did try to be crafty and save myself some cash, as I am on a budget. I bought one of those generic refills, you know the ones that are almost half the price of your refills. Yeah, seems as though you don't want to let those work either. I have to confess I am somewhat angered by all of the chicanery I have encountered these past few days. While I think you make excellent products, your business practices leave something to be desired and in all honesty, I wish you all would lick me where I shit.

I, like a million other people, as well as yourselves, am busy and don't have time for the nonsense and ballyhoo of running around trying to find the square peg that will fit in the round hole. It would behoove your company to clearly label refills and be a little less tight-assed with all of these "cartridge cannot be recognized" messages. These are the kinds of things that make me want to throw your fucking printer out the fucking window and go and take food out of my children's mouths, so I can buy an HP printer.

I expect to see changes made, effective immediately, otherwise I hope you are all sodomized by a tribe of Alabama Hellbillies. Were it not for the relaxing music I have on now, I might have had the gumption to do the job myself.

Fuck You Very Much,
JJ

You know...

It was a good day. A long day, but a good one. Normally I like to sleep a little longer on my day off but, today
there were just things I had to do. Doctor's appointments to keep, phone calls to make and even though I feel
not to bad about it, I blew off the unit meeting at work. Fuck that shit. I'm there five days a week and it's not like
I'm going to get over time for the meeting, so why should I go in on my day off? Exactly...

The doctors was good, scary but good. Now is time to own up for all of the bullshit I have done in the past ten
years. Hey, you don't take care of yourself, the only person you can blame is yourself. Does that make it suck
any less? Of course not, but at least I know who to point the finger at.

Started writing workshop at the LC tonight. I think it went really well. Varying degrees of experience and ego and
overall a good mix. It may be to early to tell but I think I may want to continue on with the teacher. After one class,
she was able to get me to do what no one teacher has been able to make clear to me. Writing honestly, though it is
hard work, gave me a sense of accomplishment greater than the uneasiness I felt baring my secrets to strangers in
a four-walled workshop.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

Check under the bed...

When it rains, it pours and this old man is in need of some snoring...among other things.

Could not fall asleep for the life of me last night. Lots of intrusive thoughts: injury, motor accidents, monsters in the house. What's odd is that it truly is the monsters in the house that gets me all fired up. I mean, you and I know there are no monsters, but trying telling that to my subconscious, who as of late, has been a complete bastard.

Saturday was 60 degrees and I was sweating wearing jeans to work. Today it was cold as fuck and at times, I wish I brought my winter coat. It would be nice if Winter would be consistent but I am not going to complain about the warm, warm temperatures for January.

Went to China Buffet tonight. *bangs head on desk* Why do I do these things to myself? It was not dreadful but it was not good either. Last time I force myself through a meal like this, I was living in London and happened upon a Chinese buffet, Yee Tung. Apparently the buffet was really buckets of curried onions and unless you ordered a liquor drink or a cola, you could not have a glass. To be honest, I was looking around for the community water bucket by the end of the meal. Yes, so dinner was not the best tonight and I have since become a gastronomical disaster since then. I'm going to go and take some emergen-c before bed. It cures hangovers and heart disease and this horrid flu going around, why shouldn't it be able to wash this horrid peanut oil fury out of me?

Tomorrow I'm going to start to carry my digi-camera with me. I'm going to document my life (or at least try to) for a year. I may only last a month or even a day but it's something to do besides obsess about the negative.

Work has been busy and I am up for a promotion. No reason I should not get it, as I am the senior most operative on the unit, save for my supervisor. It's a little more pocket money, very little but at least it's better than nothing. Myspace has again put me in contact with some old friends. I can see how people hate it. I mean there is a very real evil to it but with everything. All in moderation. Time to change the wash over.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

A Quick Note...

before bed.

I don't know where "the red" is coming from but it's coming and more importantly, I'm not so sure I know how to stop it.
It may have something to do with the fact I had to go to a meeting, at work, on my day off. There is also the writing class
I signed up for that meets twice, to the tune of $75. I know that's not a lot of money to most people, but when you put your
body on the line, everyday like I do, $75 can seem like a kings ransom. *sigh* Maybe it's time to look for another job. It's
not like I haven't put my time in. Two and a half years in a month or so and gratefully only one major injury and some minor
bumps and bruises. I just wish I could find something where I was remotely happy and didn't have to suck any type of
corporate or soul-sucking cock. Aye...there's the rub now, isn't it?

Hung out with el capitan and bscrazy after work today. Was supposed to go and join Bally's with bscrazy but I don't have
the $$$ and FUCK BALLY'S. They don't want me to be healthy, they want to sell me shit. If nothing else, the treadmill in
the basement is reminder enough I have what I need to work out. I really don't need to work with weights yet. I mean
eventually it would be nice, but I'd like to drop a few more lbs before that happens.

I think I am attracted to that which is not good for me. We know this is the case with food but with women, I am finding it
harder and harder to stay away from people who are either just bad news in general or who in the long run, will absolutely
crush me in some way. bscrazy might just be the later of those two. Smart, funny, independent, attractive, (-)smoker
and a co-worker but yet, possesses something making me want to be less of a loner Dottie, less of a rebel.

Maybe in all actuality, it's more of a rebel. We hang out and I yearn for cool shoes and cool tattoos, however, these could
also be the ramblings of a scene-king, whose reign came to an end about eleventy billion years ago.

And with that, I'm off to bed.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ

So this is...

the new year.

I used to think I knew what was going on, then I listened to William Shatner's latest recording, "Has Been."
Clearly the world is coming to an end. With such big names as Ben Folds, Brad Paisley, Andrian Belew and
Henry Rollins, you'd think liking this disc would be easy. You'd think...

But its not.

Nope. It has all the herky-jerky vibe of that late 60's spoken word, bongojamzilla that probably made Shatner think
he was something more than James T. Kirk. SURVEY SAYS!!!! XXX

Anywho, work has been busy, busy, busy. If nothing else it helped the holidays pass by. The older I get, the more
I seem to resent things most take joy in. This is probably due to the industries I work in. Come to think of it, retail can
ruin Christmas for anyone. Even though I have been out of that racket for awhile, all the hustle and bustle of the holiday
season usually make me want to take a hostage.

Anyone get anything good for the holiday? I got a case of diet dr. pepper and an erection, so it was a banner year at the
Jackass residence.

My musical recommendations as of late are as follows:

Vince Guaraldi: A Charlie Brown Christmas. Shut up...this one puts even me in a good mood.

Breaking Benjamin: Phobia. Third release. Very, very polished but songs are still good and I just dig these guys.

Thirty Seconds to Mars: A Beautiful Lie. The more I listen to these guys, the less I hope Jared Leto continues acting.

I hope everyone had a safe and happy holiday season. I recommend Emergen-c for hangovers and any and all ailments.

I hope you all are well.

Cheers,
JJ